


Admitting It

by NekoAbi



Category: Sanders Sides (Web Series)
Genre: Awful Title Syndrome, Kissing, M/M
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2018-12-07
Updated: 2018-12-07
Packaged: 2019-09-13 06:27:49
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,897
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/16887354
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NekoAbi/pseuds/NekoAbi
Summary: Logan goes to see Patton about something relating to feelings. Something interrupts and Logan's left alone in Patton's room, which leaves him working on auto-pilot.





	Admitting It

He would never admit it out loud.

He did not do feelings after all.

He would keep reasoning it away.

—-

Logan sighed as he looked at the wall, vaguely staring at it all but ultimately just staring at nothing. There was something off in him today.

It did not make sense to him. After all, everything was fine. Nothing was wrong with the others, everyone had seemed perfectly normal when they’d had breakfast. His own work was going well, for the most part.

He could not understand it.

He sighed again as he leaned his body back into the chair. He would need to do something about this odd empty feeling in his chest. It was beginning to affect his work ethic, and that could not stand.

Logan made up his mind and stood up, leaving the office chair to spin slightly from the sudden movement. He pushed the chair into its place under the desk, exited his room and made his way across and knocked on another door.

“Just a second!”

There were a few noises before the door swung open to reveal the smiling face of the occupant. Logan barely noticed the empty feeling beginning to fade.

“Logan!” Patton’s eyes lit up as he realised who stood in front of him, “What are you doing here? You never come to visit me!”

“Greetings Patton. I was merely coming to see if you could help me understand something. May I come in?” Logan attempted to ignore the lightness that was slowly replacing the empty feeling he previously had.

Patton practically squeaked and moved to the side, allowing the other inside. He closed the door behind them and made his way to the bed. He sat cross-legged on the edge as he faced Logan, who’d taken the chair. “So, what can I help you with?”

“Well, there’s this-” Logan began, before Patton’s phone buzzed in his pocket. The other glanced down, quickly pulling the phone out. Logan couldn’t help but notice the concerned look that passed Patton’s features as he looked back up at him.

Patton moved to get off the bed and went to open his mouth to apologise, but Logan put a hand up to stop him, “It’s alright. I can wait, I’m sure whatever’s happening is important. Go.”

He watched as the other let out a breath before smiling brightly at him, “Oh, thank you! Just make yourself at home, kiddo. I’ll be back as soon as possible!” Logan watched as he practically ran out the door, the cat hoodie he’d gifted him almost getting caught as the door shut.

Logan let out a deep sigh as he glanced around the room. He noted the piles of various objects piled high, when something familiar caught his eye. He carefully pulled it out and held it up, a small smile coming to his face.

“He still has this… even after he replaced it…” Logan spoke under his breath, pulling the old cardigan that previously graced Patton’s being closer to himself. “Why is this making me smile? How is this making me feel anything? This doesn’t make any sense. Surely this is wrong…”

Logan’s eyes closed as he took a deep breath, before they shot open wide with a soft noise. He placed a hand on his chest, feeling something warming inside of him. His gaze immediately shot down to the object in his hands. His breathing quickened ever so slightly, as it was pulled closer to his chest once again – this time, his body seeming to act on autopilot. Thoughts swam through his head as he tried to make sense of it all, but ultimately being unable to.

He was not aware of his actions until his gaze shifted to the side and he caught his reflection in the mirror. Logan froze, eyes wide.

“When… when did I put it on?” His eyes ran down his now covered arms, the fabric hanging loosely around his frame. Patton was slightly larger than the rest of them, so it made sense it would be just a touch too big for him. What didn’t make sense to Logan was the soft smile he saw on his reflection’s face. “This is surely just wrong…” He tried hard to convince himself, but in some part of his head, it just made sense.

The warmth he felt being surrounded by the garment, of course. His normal shirt was short-sleeved so of course it would be warmer, but the internal warmth…

The fact he felt calm and safe now wearing it also confused him. The thoughts still swam, but ever so slowly they were lining up to form an answer that Logan wasn’t sure he wanted.

His voice wavered as he spoke to himself again, “Surely not… I cannot. I’m… I mean…” He trailed off before laying his body down slowly onto the soft surface of the bed sheets. His hand ran across it slowly, new ideas running through his mind.

“Maybe…” He spoke aloud again, before inexplicably closing his eyes and falling asleep.

—-

Patton softly shut the door behind him as he left the room, crossing the hallway back to his own. He felt terrible about leaving Logan like that, but he knew that it was an emergency. He smiled to himself as his hand clasped around the door handle, turning it to allow himself in.

“Okay, I’m back. What di-” He stopped short and clapped a hand over his mouth to make sure he made no sound.

It took a moment, but eventually the door clicked shut and Patton made his way closer to his bed, hand still over his mouth. The sight was too cute and he was scared that if he made even a single noise, he would disturb it.

Curled up into himself, Logan was sound asleep on his bed. Not only that, but his upper body was covered in the old cardigan he used to wear.

Patton was suddenly torn between two options: either he left Logan be and went to relax in the common area, or he joined him. The latter option was a lot more appealing the more he thought about it.

That’s how he found himself gently laying himself down onto the bed, eyes never leaving the body in front of him. Every small movement of the bed made Patton flinch, but never truly deterred him. Finally, he was laying behind Logan’s body, just watching how his body rose and fell with each steady breath.

As he wriggled slightly to get comfortable, Logan moved. Patton stiffened immediately, his breathing halted completely.

The sleeping man turned and latched onto the warm body that was sharing the bed with him. His arm fell across Patton’s waist, his head landing softly on the shoulder and nuzzling in, causing the glasses he wore to tilt and push against his nose. The movement stopped as quickly as it began.

Patton let out the breath he was holding, but dared not to move just in case. It took several moments for him to relax his body fully, all the while he stared at the other’s relaxed face.

He thought about how often this crossed his mind as he let his arms rest around the other. He smiled as he thought about it happening again. It dropped as he thought about the idea of Logan waking up, how he’d likely be horrified and hate him.

“That’s not now…” He told himself, whispering as he tilted his head to the ceiling, unable to face Logan. He closed his eyes as let his head drop again, willing himself to sleep, to just enjoy this moment. He’d come up with something when they both woke up… right?

—-

Logan was slowly becoming conscious again. He groaned to himself as he realised that he’d fallen asleep. His eyes stayed shut as he stretched out his body slightly, but then paused.

He could feel something next to him.

Something warm.

That wasn’t normal.

Logan’s eyes shot open and he sat up with a start. He didn’t realise he’d made a noise until Patton followed his actions.

They both looked at each other, Logan’s cheeks darkening with each second that passed as he recalled the events that led to the current situation. The silence between them is suddenly broken as Patton starts to stifle his laughter.

“And what is so amusing about this?” Logan recognises his voice is higher than usual, but refuses to let it faze him. He already had one problem, he didn’t need any more.

Patton’s giggles kept trying to escape him as he took in the other’s current appearance. Slightly mussed hair from the nap, dark pink cheeks accompanied by the wide eyes that refused to stop darting around, and his usual outfit covered by a piece of Patton’s own wardrobe. “I’m sorry! It’s just that you’re too darn adorable!” He finally spoke, meeting Logan’s eyes again, “I mean, you feel asleep in my room waiting for me and you’re wearing my old cardigan.” The giggles had stopped, as more words spilled from him, “You also cuddled me as you slept so peacefully. It was… adorable…” He dropped his gaze down the hand that was still somehow pressed to his chest from when Logan pushed his body up.

It took a moment for it all to process in Logan’s mind and he snapped his head down to look at himself, unable to move as he realised that he was still wearing it. “I- You-“ He stuttered, unable to get his brain to make a coherent sentence.

Patton changed the subject quickly, trying to help, “Oh right! You said you needed my help with something. What was that?” He smiled wide, hoping it would work.

Logan moved his head back up slowly, “I… did… yes.” Their gaze met again as he remembered the final thought he had before he slept, “There was… a feeling I was having.” He pretended to ignore the sudden interest that appeared in Patton’s eyes, “but I feel I understand it now.” Logan shifted his body slightly, turning it more towards his current companion. “There is something else that now I need your assistance with, however. A… theory, I would like to work with.”

Patton’s head tilted to the side and he made a small noise of curiosity, “What is it?”

Logan steadied himself with a breath before darting in and placing a quick kiss onto Patton’s lips. He moved back and studied the reaction that the other had.

It was a moment where nothing happened. Patton just stared ahead, unmoving. Then he rushed forward, hands holding either side of Logan’s head, lips meeting in the middle.

A surprised noise escaped from Logan as his thoughts raced to catch up to what was happening. His body returned to autopilot again, relaxing and returning the kiss. It was soft and sweet, explorative in nature, yet still conveying much more than words could ever express. It felt like it lasted an age, but was over in seconds.

Yet another moment of silence and stillness, before the two smiled – one grinning madly, the other small yet affectionate. Logan’s head fell onto Patton’s shoulder as the other pulled gently at the cardigan again, groaning in annoyance and hiding the ever growing smile.

Maybe was right.

—-

He would finally admit it.

Maybe not out loud just yet.

But certainly through actions.

And certainly to himself.


End file.
